Uggghhhh!

Drama. I hate all the drama. I get a lot lately. GAH!

I want to say so many things to so many people, but half of them either don't care or don't want to listen. Some of them are not the practice-what-you-preach types. Others I understand their concern but don't think they really did everything they are telling me to do in the same situation. I also know they would not change what they did, given the chance.

And others genuinely care. They will tell me why and not just insist that they are right & I am wrong and attack me if I don't do it the way they want me to do it. To those that do honestly care... thank you. <3

Some people are telling me what to do, when they have little experience in the matter. I love when people are so sure of what they are saying, but when it comes to themselves it's a whole different story. Does god/karma/the universe/the little pink fairies/the ancestors/any-other-being (great or small)-that-you-would-like-to-insert-here hate me?? Probably.

Sometimes I want to just give up. The whole reason I wanted to do things the way I am is because I want my family there. I want to share it with them. I want to do it before my little brother leaves for 2 years. I want a lot of things, but sometimes it seems the fairies don't agree. I want it to be happy, but so far it seems like all I'm getting is stress and drama from the people I want around (and even some I don't or could really care less about). I wish people would stop being so hypocritical. If you are part of my family and are reading this, know that I still love you and always will. I could just use a little less drama than what I'm getting. It's supposed to be happy. I do realize that everything could go horribly wrong and I could be unhappy. HOWEVER, it is possible everything will go wonderfully right and we will be blissfully happy.

I also knew that when I started saying I wanted to get married, I would be criticized all over the place. Top, bottom, diagonally, slant-wise.... That many people think I'm rushing, not old enough, not thinking at all.

Life is a gamble. Waking up in the morning is a blessing. Even walking out your front door is a gamble you take every day. You never know if you will find a $100 bill in the street or get hit by a semi. Life is life. You take what you get.

Rant About Work

I am looking for a new job. Why? Because I hate the one I am at right now. I've been there 2 1/2 years (it will be 3 in November) and now I seem to be getting blamed for things I didn't do (like cleaning the floor "wrong" when I wasn't the one cleaning it...plus the scrubber is a piece of crap) or getting stuck doing things Mrs. Boss didn't feel like doing the day before (when she was supposed to do it!) or because she was "busy" to do it.

When this happens I don't have any time to do the other things I was supposed to be doing that day. Not to mention that yesterday it was just me and one other girl, about 3 daycares and families coming in. I got stuck doing this other stuff and therefore could not help the other girl, could not play games with the mass of small children, and could not restock things. This was awesome.

I almost had to sit-in on the GM meeting for Mrs. Boss because she is out of town for the next week for derby. I couldn't go sit there for a few hours (they usually talk for 2+ hours) and leave the girl downstairs all by herself! So that was a no-go. I didn't really want to sit-in for her anyway.

While I was trying to count this huge amount of $, the security guard had to sit there and oversee (so I don't get tempted to steal it, or so I don't get mugged.... something like that). He kept getting calls from the other departments, but couldn't leave. It was just him because the guy in charge of security was up in the GM meeting. It's so fun trying to count or roll tons of coins while having small children yelling out big numbers trying to guess how much I had there behind the counter.... UGH! --Yes! It's a lot of money. Please, go do something else! There is no way I had a "hundred-million-bagillion" dollars there... I am pretty sure one of us would die of old age before I got that all counted, anyway.

It seems to me like I get yelled at, while Mrs. Boss gets a slap on the wrist for screwing up. This I don't appreciate. I also have only ever gotten 1 write-up the entire time I've worked there & that was because I was super tired and forgot we had put another till into the till drawer. Then didn't count it out and had to ring everything in... I ended up being the second till amount short. This was during the hockey tournament & I got very minimal amounts of sleep. I also was NOT used to waking up at 5 am. Not used to functioning like that, when I'm usually there at either 10-11am 'til 5pm, or 5pm 'til 11pm. SO, I blame my situation. Yup.

I could transfer departments, but I really don't want to stay in that building... I am just not excited to go to work anymore. There are a few people I would miss, but several I would not. Every once-in-a-while I have fun playing games and whatever, but if they don't listen I get irritated and almost want to yell at them. :(

Therefore, I am looking for an assisting job. There is one in Taylorsville that says you would be working at the front desk Mondays & Thursdays, and doing assisting stuff on Tuesdays. It was posted the 29th(?) of June. I wonder if it's still available? I have to write up my resume. Gah... :/

There are some other ones that want me to have tons of experience or have certifications for everything. Some I would have to renew, others I've never had or heard of. Like for coronal polishing... Never even knew they had certifications for that....

I really want one with benefits and no crappy hours that are not predictable in the least (like now... it's always different and if something comes up (like a party, graduation, girlscout sleepover, etc), I could be stuck there from 10 and night til 7 the next morning). I need one that would work around school. That would be AWESOME if I could get one with all that! :)

Still looking, but want a new one VERY soon.

(P.S. They still get my name wrong. My boss can't spell it right for some reason.... I always write it the RIGHT way, she always spells it the "normal" way. She can get the other girl's right... Maybe that is because she has a weird name? Very different "black-girl" name some might call it. I think even on my checks they spell it wrong. The bank loves to ask which one is the right spelling. I tell them they have it right, work has it wrong.)

SHHOPPINNG!

I went shopping auntie/sister Bexie today! We found a few wedding dress patterns we both liked. They were even on sale (for $1!!) so we got 2 that we might use. We are planning on lookin around at the loverly stores tomorrow before they close (because they was closed by the time we met up today). I'm excited! :)

I hope we find something good! Ahhh.... It's so hard to decide on things because there is so much stuff that is CUTE (and lots that is very not-so-cute)! We were looking at stuff online and in the sewing books for patterns and making fun of poses and just designs of dresses... Oh my wow... o_O

Talk about scary! Hahaha...

+ Organizing My Space +

It would be nice to have everything look sooo organized like that, but I have much more than 3 pairs of pants, 3 dresses, 3 pairs of shoes & 10 shirts....

And my closet looks nothing like this (set up, I mean). I think I will need to take my porcelain dolls out from my top shelf. Oh, but where to put them??

I really want to organize my room. It's just that usually when I start I'm totally psyched about it, then I start getting rather bored with it. I've been looking at different sites trying to find inspiration for my closet space and what to do with things I want to keep. I also need to decide what to ditch (stuff that I never use and *hopefully* won't miss) and what to keep around. It proves to be difficult every time. I could end up with so much extra room! I love buying cool boxes to put my stuff in! I have lots of room for shoes (a hanging rack on my door & a shoe carousal thingy), but I have to get rid of some of my shoes... You know, so I can get more! Hahaha! :P

I found a book that I am going to check out from the library & see if it helps. We shall see. I especially need to get rid of lots of things if I am gaining a roommate so-to-speak in September! :)

Actually it's kind of the other way around. I'm moving in with him. Lots of changes coming soon! That means lots of stress.... but stress in a good way.

Isn't this shoe thing cool?! I kinda want one! Or find one that would fit boyfriend's shoes.... He has a problem with shoes too..... o_O

Applied

I just sent in my application! I didn't put together the resume. I was having a very hard time deciding what to say. . . and every outline I saw was different. So I didn't know which one I wanted to use. :( All well. I'm sure it will be ok without it.

Boyfriend was having a very bad day. One of those the-world-hates-my-guts type of days where nothing goes right. You know how I mean. On top of that he's having like asthma attacks or something! I'm not really sure what to call it, but he has had 2 episodes of not-breathingness today. Not. Good. :(

I took him to get some of his favorite food (the spicy chicken asiago sammy from Wendy's!) and some allergy medicine, so he's feeling a little better. I hope the drugs we got him help. He says nothing hurts, he just closes off and can't breathe.

Poor boyfriend. I hope his day is better tomorrow. I hope mine doesn't suck tomorrow. That would be great...... o_o

ReSuMe

trying to put together a resume, because i have no idea where the first one i made went to. i am not liking trying to think of how i want to word things & what i want to say about myself. it's difficult.... :\

i also really need to get to bed so i will not be extremely tired tomorrow at work. blah.

Jobz, Carz & Stuff

I think the only party this week is a Graduation over-nighter, but I don't have to work that night. Yay!

They keep switching us around, though. I guess the other girl forgot to ask for certain times or certain days off. She has family coming here from New Jersey. Then the boss forgets that she has to work the morning shift on Thursday because she has t

o do something... So most of my schedule has been flipped around. Awesome...

I have been trying to find my resume, but don't know where it went. I might just have to go off the notes from my dental class & then add on to that from what I have done since then. So I need to do that.

I also need to look for cars & other jobs. Mom said something about where my uncle works. So I guess it's between that and finding a dental job. I'm getting sick of working where I am. It's nice being able to ask for certain days off, but it's irritating when you need a day off & can't get it because there are only 2 people to cover for you and half the time they are busy or just can't

for whatever reason.

Ms. Boss will have to pick another manager soon. She's been putting it off for a while because she doesn't want to rush it. Thing is she has a huge hard ball tournament next month that is a week long. It will be more of a fiasco than the last 2 weeks. I think Jim said something about it going from 5am to like midnight. Screw that! Especially if there are only 3 of us to work it! No way, Jose! I might not even be working there by then... I sure hope not. If that's the case, Ms. Boss will need to hire 2 new managers. That ought to be loads of fun! Ha!

We will see....

I am getting so sick of it. Some days are fun, but not as much lately.

And now for something Completely Different.....